Tuesday, October 25, 2016


Offroad adventures
During an impromptu, unguided hike under a towering canopy, The Pilgrim's Progress came to mind. I had found myself doubting the faintly-marked, narrow trail that wound its way across a changing terrain - tree roots the width of my thigh, clay hills, muddy banks and ancient rocks - wondering if the route was outdated, tempted with each passing minute to search for another way besides the never-ending path we were on whenever alternative options looked easier or voices were heard through the trees.

Half-tumbling, half-stomping through the uncertain undergrowth, when we finally reached our journey's end it dawned that whether shadows threaten or our hearts embrace nature's beauty, if we pursue the path steadfastly, we will arrive at our destination.

Just as it was on the hike, so it is in life. I was reminded that though the earth's riches may beckon, and worldly wisdom captivates with her allure, though distractions may direct affections and energy elsewhere, and anxiety brings us low, all that is required in this Christian life is that I remain a faithful witness and helper, loving God and His church (what that looks like in practice is another story!).
There is no promise that the path will be free from burrs or creatures that sting and cause harm; there will be times when the path is showered with mercies abundant. Whatever our personal experiences, we walk humbly in the footprints of giants who have gone before us, knowing that even as our heart's yearning is for a distant future, the groaning itself is a gift, as we wait eagerly for redemption at the end of a long road of perseverance.   

James 1:4 
Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.

Thursday, September 08, 2016

Balancing flavours

Porcini mushrooms and pan seared scallops on charred fennel bulb.

If we put prejudices aside and give dislikes a second chance (in this case, fennel), we may surprise even ourselves with the outcome.

Sunday, August 28, 2016

Getting there

To achieve balance, one needs to accept that falling multiple times is simply part of the process as we learn to find our feet on shaky ground. Failure does not characterise the fall.
There is joy yet to come.

Sunday, July 31, 2016

Highland romance

With perseverance and grace, we may yet see the wreckage of our past redeemed in ruddy wonder.

Saturday, July 23, 2016

Dreaming again

Last night I dreamnt that I had to look after an albino baby koala. Whilst cradling it, I stepped into a glass elevator in a shopping mall, which then went up several floors, passing black and white geometric designs along the way.

I wonder if a dream interpreter will affirm that it means I'll have a white, Aussie baby during my climb up the corporate elevator in creative design.

Wednesday, May 18, 2016

The rise and fall

What an absentminded lot we are! How short-sighted and myopic! How disgustingly pig-headed and corruptible, selling our souls for measly fifty dollar bills and bags of rice planted with our own hands!

It is no wonder the wrath of Malayan titans settle on Fairland Sarawak, ready to rip her people to shreds, condemning us to an eternity of deserved derision for betraying indignant ignorami, too lofty and important to breathe humble reason, insistent that the blame lies at a door made of zinc, held up by rusting twine and resigned hopes.

It would appear that the rags-to-riches Cinderella story only works before midnight; when promises of bright lights are lapped up by stepchildren in a starry-eyed moment and the shattered dreams of an age ago are quickly forgotten. But as the chimes end and hands turn, dazed mice are left scrambling for pieces of broken pumpkin, after carriage wheels have crushed them into dirt.

Yet there are a precious few who have been willing to ignore the seemingly futile effort of creating a tidal bore and have crossed the road yet travelled, to lead by serving instead of requiring, to pioneer peace into a bruised heartland, to initiate wisdom without withholding, to restore without refrain.

To strangers who become family, this is our tanah tumpah darahku, ibu pertiwiku.

Lofty titans may eventually benefit from the hands of the meek, reaping what they did not sow, eating what they did not plough, but the real reward lies in forged friendships, woven kinship, widened perspective and renewed vision to nurture a nation still on its knees.

Monday, February 01, 2016

Going deep

At the moment my windows are frosted; 
laced with uncertainty, 
straining to catch a glimpse of what is to come, 
trying to enjoy the view.

Wednesday, January 06, 2016

Disappearing fruitcake

Between Johnnie Walker and Bebo Norman, I am feeling anxiety creep up again as an imminent deadline looms nearer. Perhaps it's time to face facts and sign up for therapy instead of mulling in the fermentation of my own addled mind and self-doubt.

On one hand it seems reasonable to doubt, right even, given that life is not about finding myself, or creating myself, despite what Taylor Swift wishes the masses to believe. Deliciously tempting as it is, however much I try to convince myself otherwise, people are not mere shadows in the night, a passing moment in a journey centered on me.

Although on paper, 2015 has been a year of unexpected highs, the year has left me emotionally tired. Drained and stripped bare with flesh tender and raw, from exposed wounds that time only hid but did not heal and suppressed memories, the superficial highs only remind me of locust years, of looking everywhere but where I know I should be looking; doing everything in my power, which adds up to insanity; a headless chicken run-around, getting more and more tangled in the weeds and thorns, the product of my hands.

Despite the choked-up season, the Gardener is still watching; carefully unwinding the weeds that hold branches back and replanting roots that have been dragged down in mire. Panic rises as self-reliance is peeled back every morning yet there is freedom in loosing what should never have taken hold in the first place.