Tuesday, April 20, 2010

As much the "how" as it is the "what"

I bought my DKNY perfume today :) I had wanted to buy it for the longest time so I decided that today was going to be the day. The would-be happy shopping experience was marred by the most lousy customer service salesperson in Metrojaya Midvalley who, not only ignored my wheedling for freebies but also more or less picked up the wares he/she/transgender/it/zhe had decided I would buy and marched off to the counter for me to pay (URGH!!). Metrojaya would probably give the said lousy service operator the *Glamoursales Award" of the year if they even bother to observe their CCTV footage.

If I had not been so set on buying DKNY today, I would have blacklisted the whole product range AND Metrojaya to boot.

It did however, get me thinking about other things in life. Especially that the 'what' we do although important, should not sideline the 'how' we do the 'what' we have decided to do. Attitude matters. It really is the thought that counts.

In work, it is not the "telling-off" of your secretary that is wrong - most of us do it and those of us who do not probably don't care about the quality of work as much - rather, it is how you tell her she is wrong. Do you yell racial abuses or make snide comments to put her down? Do you highlight her inadequacies in a fit of spite and malice? Is it so hard to be firm but considerate, insisting but polite? The product you project is the brand you make for yourself.

Are your relationships selfish and demeaning? Do they seek to hurt rather than edify? Do you see cracks over character? Are you gracious or a grumbler? Do you chide without comprehending? Do you patronize without protecting? Are you in love with your relationship and not the person? Are you in love with the idea that you are in a relationship rather than nurturing and strengthening the bonds of two complex human beings? The worth and value you put in your friends is reflected in how you treat them and if you don't treat them very well, it's nobody's guess and everyone's game that you're not exactly good company to keep.

In many ways, the 'what' is determined by circumstance. The 'how' takes a good look at your mugshot. I look at mine everyday. Some things are hard to change. It doesn't mean I don't try. It doesn't mean that I want to try. But I try because it's how I want to live.

You only have one life. How are you going to live it? Here's one way.

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