Saturday, November 07, 2009

The end of the beginning

Yesterday was my last day as a chambering student. My only consolation is that God wants me here more than I want to be. Don't get me wrong, I am comforted and confident that this is where God wants me to be but it's hardly a self-assured confidence rather, it is of quiet faith, patient endurance and humble perseverance.

Bursting into tears whilst typing emails surrounded by mountains of files that need to be exorcised is common fare these days. As long as I manage to hide my red-rimmed eyes from the Clients, the misery goes unnoticed. Staring at grey carpet, wondering whether a certain ball of fluff was there the day before is more comforting than watching lives go by. Some Clients are driving me to the dangerous brink of shoving their business back in their face and telling them to take their upturned noses, ridiculous expectations and shallow pockets elsewhere.

Should being a 'professional' dictate what I should and shouldn't do?

Or, should being true to myself dictate how I carry my 'profession'?

I'm really tired.

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