Friday, October 10, 2008

My God Is So Big

There's a song we used to sing in Sunday School:

My God is so big,
So strong and so mighty,
There's nothing my God cannot do... for you!

Have you ever wondered... what's in it for me?

I tell God I want to be broken but as I'm being broken, I find myself fighting Him all the way.

I tell God I want to forgive but I find more glee in satisfying Disdain and Contempt than in pleasing my Lord.

I tell God I want to stop being angry over whatever it is I'm angry about and I can feel myself getting angry just talking about being angry.

I tell God life is not going the way it should and then I twist life so that it goes even further from the direction it was meant to take, just because I think the paths I choose will get me to where I want to be.

Somewhere along the timeline of my life, 'my God' has been replaced with... me.

Mutiny.

The Bible speaks of many a time when Israel decides to live for herself and overthrows the kingship of God and ignores the warnings of His prophets. You don't have to read the Bible from start to finish to discover the result of mutiny. Death.

Am I in such eager anticipation to die that I can feel no fear of God in my heart? Can someone tell me what it is to fear God?

Am I still prescribing stubbornly to the 'me' sitting on the throne of my life?

My God is so big, so strong and so mighty.

My God.

The outcome doesn't matter. The punishment will fit the crime. Moments of doubt will appear to be either foolishness or times when the Evil One was making footholds. Even as flames may lick my fleshless feet and my clothes are singed with smoke, I will cling to my God with a truer cry than I can ever give in this life, in purer conviction than I can now comprehend; I'm Yours, save me.

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